Hubby’s Wellbeing Fund
The year my husband bid adieu to his 20s and entered his 30s I was reminiscing on the decade past. I thought about all the responsibilities he was shouldering through his early 20s when we got married. We had recently turned into a single income home with the addition of a new member and still adjusting to the curbed expenses lifestyle.
As he cut corners to pay home loans and bills, the brunt fell on splurging on his wardrobe out of many similar liberties he afforded for himself. He wasn’t as much bothered as I was predicting the entire week’s worth of outfits he would adorn. The faded and too familiar shirts were beginning to rack my nerves.
So choosing a birthday gift wasn’t much of a task as you can imagine. I wanted to give him a 30s wardrobe facelift. I decided to create a “Hubby’s Wellbeing Fund” and started planning a year in advance.
Being a stay at home mom with all the earlier savings invested into a new house left nothing to start with. It was a desire strong enough and needed an amount big enough to change a good part of his wardrobe. In the meanwhile I was scrounging for freelance work to keep my grey cells active and my hobbies (read shopping) updated. With every assignment I lay a sum aside for the fund.
A year passed and on his birthday I was able to give him the ‘well-being’ I so desired. He was happy but maybe a play station would have scored me more brownie points. Men!
Why Do You Want To Earn Money?
A few days later we had a discussion about me finding an avenue to earn regularly. He asked me what my motivating factor was. I was downright honest and replied, “Why! Money of course”. He then asked, “Why is it so important when we are comfortable on the current income?”
It was true. He provided everything we needed. We were still eating out and buying things. Then why was it so important to me to earn? I told him, “If I had taken you shopping on your birthday and then paid with your card would it have the same feeling when I had paid with my hard earned money?”
No it won’t. Not to me. I found joy in giving a gift because I had traded my time, skills and handwork. The labor tasted sweet, liberating and provided the confidence that no amount of “saving from the home expenses” could have.
Financial independence is not just about earning a sum but its more about earning the free will to spend the money I brought in, the way I want to. A tangible proof of the value of work. It’s about honor, courage and security. It’s about freedom of choice and being prepared for the unknown future.
You may not buy presents with it but maybe fund your little one’s college fees someday. You may create a nest to afford a respectful old age. It could mean anything to you but it has to mean something.
Every woman deserves to give herself this independence. It’s not about earning millions but it’s about those hundreds that give you a sense of accomplishment. A little can be enough if you earned it and invested it well.
As women we pass on a legacy to our young girls to be able to land on their feet. To hone atleast one skill that can generate income. To be street smart and self-reliant. It is a much valuable gift to teach to fish than to give a fish. And fish we must.
PS: If anyone wishes to give me a million dollars please feel free to do so. Happy Women’s Day!
Guest post by Sheryl. Thank you Sheryl.
Writing is an ally for Sheryl whose attempts to juggle her creative outlets and motherhood are often met with piled up baby diapers and crowded kitchen sink. Sheryl’s love for words, however, has nothing to do with her frequent realization that her tongue needs a ‘backspace’ button too. Satire and humour form part of her arsenal against much of her woes. Her writing looks to engage people in conversations that point towards a more desirable and livable world. Find her on Twitter @SherylShijuSam.